Using a banana peel to masturbate

Doctors have warned horny young men to refrain from using banana peels to masturbate — the latest bizarre sex trend circulating on social. A Reddit thread reveals that young men are jacking off using banana peels. Sexual health experts recommend using masturbation sleeves. Masturbating with a banana skin could lead to infection and rashes. Doctors are warning men not to use banana peels for self-pleasure, which is apparently a hot new trend circulating on social media, The Sun. Don't masturbate with banana peel if you don't want to explain an infection. Now let's check in on how men have taken the news— oh no.

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Banana peel masturbation the plastic handle end—the steel end. Flathead, not Phillips. I just jiggled it around and took it out. Then I continued jerking off. One day while futzing around in our house—it was probably two in the afternoon and I was still in my pajamas, just in case you want to get a picture of how relaxed I was—I blazed some chronic and got a massive case of the munchies. So I fucked the third sandwich instead. Came in it, too. Then I fed the whole sandwich to my dog. Is that wrong? Totally weird sensation. Feels like someone else is jerking you off. I found that toilet-paper rolls were the perfect Banana peel masturbation. Ah, youth. I do nearly everything with my left hand, including jerking off.

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OK girls, calm down. I put "slut" in quotation marks. I'm not calling your wardrobe "slutty" in a sexist, misogynistic or horrendous mean-girl way. It's actually a compliment, babes. I've kindly reclaimed the word "slut" on this bright and cheery Monday. When I say you dress like a slut, what I'm really saying is you dress fabulously sexy and supremely fierce. Some assholes might say you dress like a slut in a bitchy, condescending way, but that's not me, my fellow sex kittens. I'm on your side. When I say you dress like a slut, I'm saying you're dressing like a wildly empowered woman who isn't ashamed of her body. I'm saying you're a ferocious modern babe who is actively taking ownership over her sexuality. I'm saying keep rocking that crop top and don't let anyone take your absolutely American freedom of attire away from you.